about the Serenity Prayer
A foundation of my peace of mind is the Serenity Prayer.
God, grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change,
courage to change the things I can, and
the wisdom to know the difference.
Over the years, my understanding of it has deepened and grown richer. At core, its truth is simple: I can only change myself, not other people. I may be able to change a situation if I have enough power and cooperation from others; however, it may not be a lasting change. The lasting change is that which I make in myself, my attitudes and my behavior.
Years ago, I had a blow-up with my mother in front of my father. Later, he explained to me that my mother was not going to change and I would have to approach her differently. Naturally, I railed against that. It wasn't fair!
Of course, later I realized that my father was completely right. And that fairness has absolutely NOTHING to do with it. It's like the question "would I rather be right or happy?" Then, I sure wanted to be right. And I was certain that if the important people in my life would just do what I wanted them to do, I would be happy. I resisted the idea that I could change my own attitudes. It seemed too harsh that I was the one who had to change. Why couldn't those annoying other people do some changing?
Now, I recognize that I can be happy regardless of what other people do or say. I do recognize that I'm affected by other people's actions and words, by situations, by environments. My choice - what I can change - is whether I allow those effects to persist or allow myself to react, or whether I respond thoughtfully and change what I can (remove myself from the situation either immediately or in time, or modify my attitude to accept someone as they are or interact with them less, etc.).
The Serenity Prayer was my first exposure to these ideas. It encapsulates "keep the focus on myself" and "mind my own business" as well as "live and let live" and "let go and let God." It gives me a practical application of reliance on my Higher Power. And it gives me something to talk about with other people - "what DOES this prayer mean? How does this play out in my life? Is THIS something I can change? Or not?"
While being of practical use in daily life, the Serenity Prayer also serves as a mantra for me when I need to calm down and when I can't fall asleep. So it's useful day and night!
God, grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change,
courage to change the things I can, and
the wisdom to know the difference.
Over the years, my understanding of it has deepened and grown richer. At core, its truth is simple: I can only change myself, not other people. I may be able to change a situation if I have enough power and cooperation from others; however, it may not be a lasting change. The lasting change is that which I make in myself, my attitudes and my behavior.
Years ago, I had a blow-up with my mother in front of my father. Later, he explained to me that my mother was not going to change and I would have to approach her differently. Naturally, I railed against that. It wasn't fair!
Of course, later I realized that my father was completely right. And that fairness has absolutely NOTHING to do with it. It's like the question "would I rather be right or happy?" Then, I sure wanted to be right. And I was certain that if the important people in my life would just do what I wanted them to do, I would be happy. I resisted the idea that I could change my own attitudes. It seemed too harsh that I was the one who had to change. Why couldn't those annoying other people do some changing?
Now, I recognize that I can be happy regardless of what other people do or say. I do recognize that I'm affected by other people's actions and words, by situations, by environments. My choice - what I can change - is whether I allow those effects to persist or allow myself to react, or whether I respond thoughtfully and change what I can (remove myself from the situation either immediately or in time, or modify my attitude to accept someone as they are or interact with them less, etc.).
The Serenity Prayer was my first exposure to these ideas. It encapsulates "keep the focus on myself" and "mind my own business" as well as "live and let live" and "let go and let God." It gives me a practical application of reliance on my Higher Power. And it gives me something to talk about with other people - "what DOES this prayer mean? How does this play out in my life? Is THIS something I can change? Or not?"
While being of practical use in daily life, the Serenity Prayer also serves as a mantra for me when I need to calm down and when I can't fall asleep. So it's useful day and night!
posted by julieannerickson at 1:58 PM
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